One form of gentleness we should
practise is towards ourselves. We should never get irritable with ourselves because
of our imperfections. It is reasonable to be displeased and sorry when we
commit faults, but not fretful or spiteful to ourselves.
Some make the mistake of being angry because they have
been angry, hurt because they have been hurt, vexed because they have been
vexed. They think that they are getting rid of anger, that the second remedies
the first; actually, they are preparing the way for fresh anger on the first
occasion. Besides this, all irritation with ourselves tends to foster pride and
springs from self-love, which is displeased at finding that we are not perfect.
We
should regard our faults with calm, collected and firm displeasure. We correct
ourselves better by a quiet persevering repentance than by an irritated, hasty
and passionate one. When your heart has fallen raise it gently, humbling
yourself before God, acknowledging your fault, but not surprised at your fall.
Infirmity is infirm, weakness weak, and frailty frail.
(S Francis
de Sales Introduction to the Devout
Life III:9)
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